I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
