Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
that is very illegal...i love you.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
