Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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