Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Randomize
