Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
