Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize