Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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