we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
