were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
i just sent this text using only my big toe
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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