A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
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