I just cut my nipple shaving
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
