Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
