Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
