Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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