It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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