I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
