Your tits are I can't wait for
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
