This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Randomize
