Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
...so i touched it.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
