my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
