I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Randomize
