I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Randomize
