did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Randomize
