sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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