so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
