so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
