Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
