That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
