i think i have herpe
just one?
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
