if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
