Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
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