She announced her abortion via fbk
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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