farters have to be the big spoon...
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
