Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
