you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
being pregnant is like rehab
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
