I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
