Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
