I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
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