I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
