Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
