she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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