I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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