So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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