Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
