I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
