so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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