just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
it hurts more in the daytime
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
