i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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