I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
i drank out of a bidet.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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