he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
